I didn’t make nearly any of the posts I said I was going to this month. I had such big plans, but with always, the days kept going by and other stuff got in the way.
So now, I am done with 2 things, I’m done
making big elaborate plans that I can’t follow through on.
Trying to make a post for an observance day post on every day.
Every day is a new observance of something, and I can find a way to relate most of them to my blog. I will make some into smaller social media posts though, and will talk about the really important ones here like 2 big post on here about the importance of Black History Month and then the next big post where I talk about Heart Health Month.
First I’ll be making a very special post that I already said I’d make to someone who emailed me about adding a new resource to the fight4mylife resource page.
Finally, I would like to say that starting this week I’ve decided to make a comeback to the YouTube channel also titled fight4mylife with the handle being fight4mylife_blog and I’ve made a separate channel for gaming where I will be using my hobby of gaming for my mental health.
That channel only has one introduction video so far, but all of the old videos are still up on the main YouTube channel for you to enjoy for the time being.
That is all I am making this post about for now because I’m sure you are all tired of long drawn out apologies from me. I have made some plans already for stuff I want to do starting this year and I still want to do then, I just need to find a balance that works for my family life.
Thank you those of you who have stuck with me, for those of you who have just subscribed, and for those of you who have reached out to me personally. It means a lot and makes me happy. I hope I can add something of value to each one of your lives too, no matter how small. If I have helped just one person, this blog will have been worth it.
It really depends on the situation. Like if people are talking about math I get bored easier than if people are talking about other topics like history or books. I also find that now days I get really anxious and bored if I’m only doing one thing at a time. Like I have to be watching tv, while on my phone,(like I am now).
And for the 30th year running I just happen to be single. I have been in relationships and been on dates, but nothing has lasted long enough or been close to Valentine’s Day. That being said, I clearly know what it’s like to not have fun being alone on this day. It can feel lonely, hopeless, and down right disappointing. But lately I have been thinking a lot about if I even want to be in a relationship at this stage in my life.
As I am about to be 30 this May it seems my biological clock is ticking. But at this current point I am very happy with my life the way it is. It could seem to some, like I just saying that because I am single, but in reality I am still learning to love myself and trying to learn who I am as an individual before I would feel right entering a relationship.
I also am not that worried about my biological clock, since I don’t see parenthood as something I personally want for myself. I am happy to just help take care of my nieces, nephews, and siblings (I have a lot of siblings).
I do sincerely hope that everyone who did have someone special to celebrate the day with had a magical day/night, and I hope that if anyone had experienced any kind of breakup or separation today that it doesn’t hurt you too badly and that with some time and healing you will be able to recover and meet your forever person when the time is right.
For everyone like me who spent the whole day single, I hope you will not see today as a day to be cynical or emotionally devastated, but that you will see it as a day to shower your self with self love and care like I did. Because you deserve it!
My final hope for all of you reading this is that in the course of the day you don’t resort to committing any kind of crimes in the name of love or revenge or anything like that. Legally, ethically, and as a human being I can’t force you to do or to not do something, but I must highly advise against committing crimes or anything similar. (unless it’s considered a legal crime to be LGBTQIA+ in your area or something similar. that shouldn’t be a crime because there is nothing wrong with it). I more mean no doing stiff like illeg drugs, murder, or stalking, stuff like that is frowned upon and illegal for good reasons generally.
So I, like usual, had this whole big plan about how I wanted to improve myself by incorporating more self-care into my daily routine. While scouring the internet for ways to improve self-care I came across a list of things to do for just that purpose
After seeing this article I thought it would be a fun idea to incorporate most of the ideas and some of my own into a nice little 20 day challenge for the month of February where we build up doing 20 micro self care habits a day until it gets to the point where we are doing all 20 mini self care activities for ourselves everyday.
I did really great on the first day with the one self care item, but by the second day I had forgotten to look at the list to do the second self care item, and while I still took a walk without my phone that day, I did not carry out the action I was supposed to add to that day.
The third day I did not do any of the actions because I still didn’t check the list and I wasn’t able to take a walk without my phone that day in case people in my family needed to get ahold of me for some family business that was going on.
For the past 2 days (the 4th and 5th) I had just given up on doing the challenge at this point, and by today I realized I needed to come clean and share how I had not passed the challenge.
What I’m getting right…
While I haven’t been adding on self care actions from the challenge like I should aside from doing the first action the first 2 days, I have not totally failed at improving my self-care.
I have been taking care of my hygiene every day which should be done automatically each day for people without depression, but when you are struggling with depression it can be difficult some days to find the energy or will to get up every day let alone doing something like bathing.
I have been spending far less time on my phone. While it may not seem like it to my mom, I have noticed that these past few days I have only needed to charge my phone one time a day instead of multiple, and that one time has been in the early evening even if I start the day with my phone at 50 percent like I did yesterday.
Today I even found time to be creative which was one of the things on the list of self care habits.
I see all of that as a win for me.
What I’m going to do about the failed challenge.
Hear me out!
I am still going to start and complete the challenge the proper way, I will Just be starting on March 1st instead of February 1st. I will still be leaving the challenge up until I finish it for good and find a new challenge to start (I may even leave it up while other challenges are in progress too) so If you have already started the challenge, it will not mess you up.
To make sure the new habits don’t escape my memory, I’m going to keep the information visible in several places, Including a calendar on my wall, a note on my phone home screen, and I will be adding each action as a reminder on my phone calendar.
To hold myself accountable for completing the challenge and not ignoring a day, I’m going to tell several people about it when I am going to start doing it including both of my moms (birth and adoptive) and my cousin who is always holding me accountable for stuff I say I am going to do or not do.
I am sorry to those of you I may be letting down with this update, but I hope you will forgive me, and stick with me going forward.
So much more!
P.S. I have also found a way to ensure I have more transportation around my city so I will be able to get out of my apartment and do more in my community which is another thing that will improve my self care.
And I have paid for quite a few of my subscription services for the whole year with just my Microsoft, Audible, PS+, and antivirus protection left to go plus a VPN if I decide to get one, so I will have more money to spend each month on things not related to subscriptions.
P.S.S.
I also still plan to get memberships to my local historic society museum, the Planetary Society, and my city zoo if it ever opens back up again, so that will give me more things to do and help me find good causes that I care about which will also help in terms of self-care.
Today is a day set aside as a reminder to begin the tough conversations we need to have surrounding our mental health. There’s never going to be a perfect time to ask for help, or to talk to our loved ones about them getting help, but if the conversation never gets started no healing will ever take place.
Whether it is our parents, our kids, our siblings, our extended family members, or our friends and acquaintances it even ourselves, we all know someone who is fighting an internal mental battle. If you feel like that is you, please don’t wait to get the help you need.
If you are concerned about a loved one and their mental health sadly, unless it’s your kids, you can’t get them into therapy just because you want them to go. Even then, you can’t force your kids to talk to the therapist if they don’t want to. But what you can do is find a way to start the conversation.
National optimist day
I have to say, I sometimes struggle to be optimistic when things get tense, but today reminds me of the importance of being optimistic and seeing the bright side of life.
I, however, have had to learn the balance between being optimistic and seeing the positives, and not being affected by toxic positivity.
While it’s good to remind ourselves to be grateful for what we do have instead if focusing on what we don’t have, it is also important to allow ourselves to feel all of our emotions and let them pass by instead of bottling them up and pretending we are ok when we are not. It is normal to be upset, scared, or even mad when we are dealing with intense situations. It’s just not okay to let those feelings trap us in a loop of negativity, or to take those feelings out in a way that harms others.
National Get-Up Day
While originally recognized in the figure skating world, National get up day, sets an important reminder for everyone to never give up and to get back up when we fall down it fail at something we decided to try.
This is a vital mindset to have as we go through life because all throughout our lifespans we will encounter obstacles and challenges we need to overcome. If we give up the first time we fall down we will never accomplish our goals or overcome these obstacles which help us grow as individuals this improving the world as a whole.
Important February month awarnesses
We won’t be mentioning all of these month observances outside of this post, but I felt like it was important to let you all know what they are for one reason or another.
I will be doing posts on these month observances
American Heart Month
Black History Month
Cancer Prevention Month
Financial Aid Awareness Month
International Month of Black Women in the Arts
Marijuana Awareness Month
National Senior Independence Month
National Wise Health Consumer Month
Teen Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month
International Friendship Month
Youth Leadership Month
National Parent Leadership Month
These month observances are important because these issues all impact mental health to some degree, but are not relevant enough for me to make a whole post about them on this blog.
Humpback Whale Awareness Month
Humpback whales are endangered at this current time like so many other animal species lately. They face problems from fishing and whaling practices and global warming changing the aquatic eco system. They are important to our planet and without our planet
International Prenatal Infection PreventionMonth
Obviously it goes without saying that infections are never good to deal with, especially for pregnant people and their babies. When our physical health is down, especially at such a critical phase in life our mental health can take a hit as well.
Low Vision Awareness Month
Being someone who wears glasses (and contacts in the past) I know how it is to struggle with vision problems, but that’s nothing compared to low vision which does not have any way it can be corrected. Statistics put it at 4.2 million Americans over the age of 40 with low vision or other vision impairments(https://lighthouseguild.org/low-vision-awareness-month/).
I can’t imagine those struggles but I know it has the potential to affect a persons mental health especially if it starts to cause them to lose their independence. There are assistive devices now that make life easier to navigate, and some may be able to get a guide dog, but these options aren’t always available to everyone.
National Children’s Dental Health Month
I was never a child with great dental health and growing up through the years I was often scared of the dentists office. I’ve even gone through braces (though that was between the ages of like 18 and 21, not as a child).
Believe it or not dental health is linked to mental health in people of all ages. Our teeth allow us to ear all kinds of different foods, smile at new people we meet and friends and loved ones, and it can really lower our self-esteem and self-confidence if there is something wrong with our mouths.
From the time we are babies until we are in our teens we go through phases of gaining and losing teeth, some like me even need to get their wisdom teeth removed. It is important to instill healthy teeth habits in our children as well as a healthy level of trust with their regular dentist when they first start getting teeth, and even before there is stuff you can do to care for their gums when they are babies without teeth. That’s why I feel this day is important to mention.
Pet Dental Health Month
Spay/Neuter Awareness Month
Unchain a Dog Month
Cat Health Month
These four observances are important to me as both a pet owner and as a living being in this world. There are many debates about whether or not anyone should have pets, what kind of pets they have, and to what extent we would go to care for them and treat them as part of the family. To me their health is just as important as ours and when my pets are happy, I am happy.
As with children it is important to take care of our pets’ dental health. They may not feel the same social losses as we do, but if they are dealing with poor dental health it can lead them to problems with their eating, it can stress them out, and it could even cause them pain. Some pets who get a serious enough dental infection can even die as an overall result.
Spaying and neutering our pets is also very important, not directly for our pets, but there is already a surplus of unadopted pets in shelters all across the country and even more abandoned on the streets. Animals also don’t all have the ability to not mate when it is their mating season which if left unchecked can ramp up the pet population. In nature the ecosystem balances out with predators and prey, but in our homes, our pets have no predators to control the rapid population increase.
The last one hits me on a personal level because I have this one neighbor who’s dog has been left outside far too often in intense weather and it makes me angry, I take a vow this month to not just sit by feeling bad for the dog, In gonna find some usable proof and take the evidence to the proper channels.
Cats are of course a common type of pet. I have had quite a few in my life. As members of our family they deserve proper health care. I have always been more if a cat person than with any other type if pet. I know you may be asking why I have a dog now, but the answer is because my mom doesn’t care much for cats and I have moved into her place as of last year.
First week of February observances that are relevant to this blog
These will all get their own posts
Children’s Authors and Illustrators Week first week
Mental Health Blog | Fight4mylife | United States 